Nicole's Story: Ovarian Cancer At 27

Hello there, my name is Nicole Walker, and this is a long one, so strap in! 

In September 2024, I started suffering from a multitude of different pains. Constant nausea, always full, unable to keep food down, vertigo, diarrhea, pain that would make me so uncomfortable I would suffer for days on end, even bumps in a car would make me cry out in pain.

I was led to believe it was all in my head, so I carried on as normal. I went to work, I lived my life, I walked my dog, all whilst in a blizzard of mind and body. I would go to work, doing a 6-6 shift, and wonder why I'd try to make coffee and get dizzy. I'd burn myself over and over and wonder why. 

Getting distracted, running behind, not knowing where I was or who I was, I felt permanently high but not in a nice way, like I was constantly on a hangover that would never end. 

Nicole sought medical help for her symptoms many times.

My body ached in every way imaginable. However, nobody I worked with understood any of this; nobody in my personal life did either, except for my partner, but that's another story in itself. They looked at me the same way everyone else around me did, like a hypochondriac.

I went on my first ever trip with my partner, for my birthday, and the entire time I was in debilitating pain. I suffered through it all, tried to have the best time, but honestly, it was like my body was failing me. 

I went to the GP as usual. I told them everything for the umpteenth time, and they told me I was just suffering from period pain, that it's normal, and to go on the pill. All that good stuff!

Fast forward to when I left my job. I could not cope with walking around on the floor anymore, or the noise, or the exhaustion that I was suffering from, so I quit. 

I found a new job beforehand, though, and it seemed like the perfect fit. It would have been if not for cancer. 

I attended my first day at the job, only a baby shift, and I bloated out two dress sizes. I could barely comprehend words, I couldn't see straight, and I was vomiting at every opportunity to do so.

My partner picked me up from work, guided me to the train, to the bus, to the hospital, where we then went through scans, and waited for 18 hours. He sat with me for the entire time, not a single complaint.

The result of this was being told I had a mass, not one they could give any information on, just a cyst of some sort.

Nicole went to A&E for her debilitating symptoms.

To which I suddenly got a flood of appointments, bloods, MRIs, and other various scans. I'm still vomiting all food and water, and I have zero cognitive function at this point.

No sort of explanation, just stress.

The last nail in the coffin was going to the GP and being prescribed laxatives, as they had no idea of what was going on.

The rest of the time was a blur. I was a pain in myself; nothing I did worked for me. I was given morphine and sent on my way. 

I can't remember a whole lot; you don't ever anticipate the concept of dying at the age of 27. I was just in pain, I was told repeatedly that I was imagining it. 

I wound up in Charing Cross Hospital. I can't remember anything until here. I was getting blood taken, but because I was so dehydrated, I just remember my partner leaving and a lovely man I refer to as the vampire, taking blood out of my foot.

Very quickly that night, the doc put me on what they call 'baby chemo'. It's a subdued version of what was to come. I lay there with a cannula in my arm. After 20 tries, they managed to find a vein, and I started the chemo, and my god.

Every ten minutes I would move and the machine would beep! Due to everything, I cried all night. I was alone in a city, with no idea if or when I would be able to leave. 

Nicole underwent chemotherapy.

I can't remember much from my chemo, as it was the baby chemo and 3 weeks in the ward, but I know they were the worst times of my life.

I had ascites, which is when the cancerous fluid builds up in your abdomen. If I hadn't been transferred when I had, I would be dead. I had bloated beyond means and the GP thought that was just being bound up. 

Luckily, I had been sent to Professor Seckl, with Dr Tahan, so that I could live to see past 27.

I truly didn't think I'd live to see 28, this is how serious it got. I woke up, slept, and got chemo; that was my life for 7 months, and I truly cannot downplay this; it was absolutely awful.

I didn't feel like myself, I had no cognitive ability, and I was constantly exhausted. I rolled between appointments, procedures, all of it I can barely remember, whether that's due to blocking it out, or just not being capable.

My life for 8 months consisted of appointments and all the previously mentioned. I was a cancer patient. Just a cancer patient. Nobody to anyone other than when it was convenient.

People ask why I cut off so many people, and it is due to people disappearing as soon as you mention the word 'cancer'.

I was put on an intensive chemo, called BEP. It destroyed me, it tore me apart, there's no other way to describe it. I suffered from multiple side effects, including but not limited to;

Headaches

Nausea

Nail depletion 

Persistent vomiting

Mouth problems.

Nicole's treatment included an intensive chemotherapy called BEP.

I can't remember those months honestly, as I was in and out of chemo wards, hospitals, and GP's. I was in a weird embodiment of hell.

I was 27 and worried about my will, that's just fucked. Ovarian germ cell cancer. What the fuck is that?! It's a tumour that can develop randomly, without your control, at any point. 

.

So ovarian germ cell isn't something you pick up, it isn't something you induce, it's something you are born with. It's a lazy cell. 

For weeks and months, I questioned whether it was something I did wrong, whether I did something to induce cancer, whether it was food, alcohol, or drugs. I questioned it all, and found it was just me, and just my lazy cell.

Thank you to Nicole for sharing this story. Learn more about the symptoms of ovarian cancer here.